Effective 1:1s
How to Have Effective One on One Sessions
It’s so important to get coaching and development meetings right. In this article I’ll discuss how leaders can schedule two very different types of one on one (1:1) conversations with their direct reports.
Preface
It’s so important to get coaching and development meetings right. In this article I’ll discuss how leaders can schedule two very different types of one on one (1:1) conversations with their direct reports. As leaders we sometimes mistake one type of conversation for the other, yet they should be different and distinct. I’ll also recommend some tips for how leaders and direct reports can get the most from these conversations. See the end of this article for an example agenda format you can use.
Like infographics? There’s a graphical version of this article. Click here to see it.First, here are some assumptions:
As a leader you:
Genuinely care and are invested in the development, well-being, and growth of your direct reports.
Are flexible and capable of adapting your communication style to meet the needs of your directs.
Have or are actively working to develop psychological safety for your team.
As a direct report you:
Are invested in your own development and quality of work.
Are open to feedback.
Are willing to provide constructive feedback.
Genuine = Trust
Being genuine and constructive is critical. I can’t stress this point enough. As a leader, if you use the information provided in this article and just go through the motions without taking the time to make the actual investment with your direct reports, the 1:1s will likely seem hollow and insincere. You have to actually care, your actions need to match your words, and you need to be consistent.
A Tale of Two 1:1s
I’ve seen leaders confuse or combine at least two different types of 1:1s and I’ve made the mistake as well. The first type is more of a status check-in or project status report. This is where a leader wants to know what is done, ask specific questions about progress, or why something isn’t done on time. These sessions typically don’t benefit the direct and are more for the manager.
The other type is a discussion that is focused on the development, growth, and support of a direct report. In my opinion this is a true 1:1 focused on helping and benefiting the employee.
Having a meeting called a 1:1 that frequently results in a line of questioning as to “why isn’t this done” may be a necessary conversation, but your discussion likely will not lead to the development or improvement of a direct report, nor will your direct report get the feeling that it’s a meeting for their benefit. Recognizing the difference and then thoughtfully, intentionally facilitating the different types of sessions is important in getting the desired outcome.
If you’re reading this and thinking, “this is pandering, work needs to get done and my directs need to be held accountable” then consider that you might be taking a more authoritarian, inflexible style of leadership. That may be is the culture in your organization. But I would argue that flexible, servant leadership is more effective in the long run in developing cohesive, effective teams. Does this mean that directs are not held accountable to be productive? No, it does not. What it means is that there is an appropriate time, place, and way to have that conversation. This is more about servant leadership and the development, coaching, and investment in a team.
Development 1:1s
Development 1:1s are meetings that should focus on the direct report. Specifically, what they need and how they’re developing or making progress on development goals. It’s important to remain focused on the individual and not on their specific project work or operational tasks. Why? One, personal development and growth will suffer. Two, a constant emphasis on output rather than the individual, especially when there had been time set aside for the individual, can easily lead to the impression that a leader or company does not care about the individual. And three, if the direct was not expecting to discuss task or project status, they may not be fully prepared, resulting in a less than effective or uninformed session, leaving all parties frustrated.
Some recommendations for Development 1:1s
Explicitly state in a recurring meeting invite that the time is for the direct and is not intended to be project tasks status meeting.
Provide a list of topics to address or speak to in each session. Example topics:
Progress on professional or personal development.
Issues or “blockers” that the leader may be able to help address.
Ideas, general questions, concerns, etc.
Check in on well-being.
If there is a development plan that someone is working on, then I’d recommend setting the expectation up front as to whether direct coaching is appropriate and whether there should be specific progress or accomplishments reviewed. In many ways this is the same as getting the right match with a personal trainer, therapist, or doctor. At the same time, as a leader I’d argue you are also responsible identifying when the approach a direct report is taking to development and growth might not align with the expected pace or timeline.
As a reminder, see the comments above about being genuine and psychological safety. The overall well-being of team members is important. There can be personal issues that a team member is working through that can affect them professionally and personally. Providing an explicit opportunity in a consistent, recurring manner for them to share information can make it easier to discuss an issue, especially in cases where someone might not be sure if they have “permission” or time to bring something up. For development 1:1s I’d recommend the Leader schedule these meetings. My impression has been that when my manager took the time to schedule these meetings, it was an acknowledgement that they felt it was important and were granting that permission, taking time to invest in my well-being.
And if as a leader you’re not comfortable with having certain kinds of conversations or are concerned you don’t know how to have a certain kind of conversation, it’s a great opportunity to bring in the HR team for help. For example, “I’m really glad we have this time set aside to identify concerns like these, and I really appreciate you sharing and trusting me with this issue. I will also share that I don’t have the right training or experience with something like this. I do understand how this could impact you personally and how you feel at work. Would it be ok if I scheduled time with our HR partner to help us together?”
Status 1:1s
Status 1:1s are meetings where specific project work, operational issues, tasks, or progress should be discussed. It’s also my experience and opinion that these are meetings that should be scheduled by a direct report with their manager or leader. Why? Leaders should set the expectation that direct reports are accountable for their work and effective communication.
Leaders, let your directs know when and in which format you expect to receive the status information. Note that this is not intended to be a complete project or portfolio update. It’s intended to provide basic information, get a decision, and/or identify topics that need discussion and a possible solution.
For weekly or every other week updates, I would suggest the following structure and in this in order shown. This enables everyone to get the quick items done first, saving the rest of the time for discussion. See a full example at the end of this article that uses the recommended structure.
Updates
These are statements. No debate or discussion should be needed. Each bullet should provide information. If written concisely in one or two sentences the item should stand on its own. Updates should require the least amount of time/discussion and can be reviewed by a leader beforehand if provided in advance.
Decisions Needed
These are Yes or No questions, concisely written in a manner that a leader can provide a yes or no decision. These may be follow ups to previous discussions or are simple enough that the question can be posited without debate or research. A minimal amount of time/discussion should be needed, and these can also be reviewed by a leader beforehand of provided in advance.
For Discussion
These are topics that are not as simple and often require discussion, debate, or additional details in order to make an informed decision. The reason for bringing up the issue, its importance, possible solutions, and desired outcome should be included. Simply stating a problem and expecting a leader to fix it is not helpful or constructive. Prioritize issues in order of importance and ensure adequate time on an agenda. These topics require the most amount of time to discuss.
Addressing Performance-Related Issues and Metrics
Performance management is a topic unto itself. You should be having regular discussions with your directs on performance, at least monthly. Small, frequent, specific feedback in the moment is more effective than “surprising” direct reports with a list of concerns at arbitrary times once or twice a year.
Status 1:1s can be a great time to provide performance-related feedback for small course-corrections or conversations. Objective metrics can be leveraged as well to communicate progress and provide leading indicators for the larger performance-focused conversations. However, trying to cover too much in one meeting can make the session rushed and dilute the value of the time together. And I would recommend leaving performance related issues out of Development 1:1s unless it is a specific topic that the direct wants to address. People need to know that their worth is not their work. Development 1:1s are about the person. Status and performance 1:1s are about work and tasks.
How to Start with 1:1s
If you’re unsure of how to start, be transparent and let your directs know. “Here’s what I’d like us to do...Here’s why…And we’re all new to this, the first few sessions might need some refinement. We’ll do four sessions, check in at the end of each, and see what we can improve.”
Tips for the Leader
Keep the sessions short, 30 minutes or less. This should help promote a concise focus.
Be clear as to whether you expect all team members to schedule the 1:1s, or if you will be. Be consistent will all direct reports.
Try to have the meetings with your direct recur on the same day and time so that it’s easier for all to be prepared and get into a regular cadence.
Ensure the meetings are scheduled frequently enough so that information and support can be provided in a timely manner.
If there is something you want or need to know, explicitly state this. Don’t expect people to know or guess. Be clear on what it is you need to know and why you need it.
Don’t punish the messenger and don’t punish transparency or accountability. Focus on solutions.
Tips for the Direct Report
Your manager is probably very busy. Be prepared and concise.
Be proactive. If you know something isn’t going well or will be delayed, call it out. And don’t make excuses, provide facts and specifics for remediation or ideas for where you might need help.
Use the right communication channel. Sending a multi-page summary of complex issues that includes images in a text message or IM is likely not an effective channel.
Provide info ahead of time if you can and summarize what it is you want them to know or what you plan to discuss.
Conclusion
Hopefully you can tell based on the nature of the agendas and topics of discussion how a Development 1:1 and Status 1:1 are different in intent and purpose, and how the specificity and concise nature of the topics, combined with providing the appropriate amount of detail in each type of session can lead to ideal outcomes.
Remember that having the meetings is just the start. Decisions still need to be made, work accomplished, and accountability maintained. Clear intent and concise communication are foundational regardless of the type of 1:1. Combined with a genuine and consistent investment in direct reports, leaders are well-positioned to set and maintain clear expectations and grow teams that can operate appropriately and independently while at the same time effectively providing information up to leadership in support of overall company goals and desired outcomes.
Example Status 1:1 Agenda and Email
The following is a fictional example email and agenda for a Senior Manager in an IT organization providing an agenda to their VP for an upcoming Status 1:1.
“Hi Lucas, here’s the agenda for our upcoming Status 1:1 on Wednesday at 1:00 pm ET. We may not have enough time to get to all the discussion items. They’re still prioritized, and the last item can wait until next time if needed.
(05 min) Updates
Renewal for vulnerability scanning license completed and within budget.
Onboarding for new hire scheduled for coming Monday, in time for project kickoff.
Third-party risk report published to our team site as communicated.
(05) Decisions Needed
SOW we requested from IAM/IGA vendor for our department requires signature. I don’t have signature authority yet. Can I send this to you for signature?
I have two lead team members that should attend training for Project X. Both the training and travel estimates are within budget, and this was expected. Do I have your approval to complete their registrations?
The Marketing team would like to present the Q4 strategy to our team. We have 15 min available in our town hall. Ok for me get them on the agenda and let them know to when to join?
(20) For Discussion
Compliance Gap and Resourcing for New Opportunity.
Sales is pursuing a new large customer. Est. $4 mil revenue annually.
Early conversations with Sales and Legal show that we will be required to meet a new audit and compliance requirement for this deal.
With some consultant support we can meet the initial requirements.
Will need to staff and maintain compliance annually.
Estimated costs are $100k in consulting to meet, and then 2 FTE to maintain (attached.)
Recommend funding from existing budget for consultant and budget for 2 new hires in next year’s budget.
Need to make a decision by end of next week so that we can inform Sales and Legal.
Hardware Refresh
On-prem web servers are coming end-of-life in 6 months.
We have the option to move to cloud and know how to migrate.
Managed Services Vendor can support whether on-prem or cloud.
Will be a 20% uplift in cost for solution, but will no longer need to support and maintain HW. Estimated savings on resource allocation and licensing attached.
Ideally, we would be able to migrate these systems to cloud so that we can reprioritize limited resources. Overall cost savings due to reduced support and licensing.
Additional User Licensing Needed
Company revenue exceeded target last quarter. New hires across the company were also 40% higher than forecasted in order to meet Sales demand.
We are projected to exceed user license count for our ITSM, Project Management, and Sales solution within 3 months.
All applicable tools will permit us to exceed license count and do a true-up at year end.
Expected true-up and additional license costs attached.
Finance has already approved the overages given the increased revenue.
Recommend we discuss options to
Detect license overruns sooner.
Ensure there is proper budget at renewal.
Negotiate better pricing given the increased license counts.